Five days and no blogging! I’m really sucking lately. I went out on Saturday night for drinks with a friend who turned a year older and still looks five years younger than me. Which isn’t entirely fair, but I forgive her, because she’s precious. I totally said mad things, as I do when I’ve just downed my fifth beer. Who does that? FIVE beers. And five days! Maybe that’s a new magic number for me? I’m not proud of the five beers by the way, but it was so much fun! No, it really was. I don’t think I was as ridiculous as I could have been, but I was certainly ridiculous. Ollie was the star of the night, all quiet and trying not to be noticed in the corner.
“Who does he look like?” I kept being asked. “Keanu Reeves?” I offered to an astounding “YES! THAT’S IT! Although, there is also a resemblance to Scott Baio.” She said, and Oliver was suitably mortified. Come on though, Scott Baio was pretty hot back in the day. I remember being pretty fond of him myself. I later heard that the quote of the night was “How did you get Neo to come to your birthday party?” Honestly, we need to get him a Matrix jacket. He already has the glasses. Sort of. And he is forever asking me if I want the red pill, or the blue pill. I’m not sure I’m ready for either actually. Just give me the white one with lots of water. Or coffee..or actually, I’m more partial to a good tea these days. Does that mean I’m getting old?
Anyway, it was so much fun. I danced and didn’t hurt my back, and I may have found the young guy who was celebrating his 21st a little too precious for his own good. Honestly, what a honey. He needs a girlfriend. Unfortunately Miss 19 who could also be my daughter, is engaged to be married. I know, I was as horrified as you are. “Hang on a minute” she said to me “how old were you when…YOU HAD BABIES!?!?!” I’m completely aloof about it. “Oh, that doesn’t count. That was back in 1996 when you were only what 12!! Prehistoric years ago! That’s what we did back in THE OLDEN DAYS!” I don’t think she bought it.
I’m sure I was going somewhere with that. Oh! Right! Cute Mr Just Turned 21! How engaging young people are! I felt hideously old and maybe slightly pervy. It was lucky I had my husband with me, because when you’re with your husband, you’re only slightly pervy right? Anyway! We set up our husbands. Or, she did. So mean of us. It was -flawlessly- executed though I have to admit. I’d come around the table to tell her we were going to go, because Ollie was starting to look wilted and the loud live jazz music was making him age just listening to it – it was so good, by the way – and obviously, we got talking as girls do. Then we’re realising, that our husbands – who are both Asian, and half of that Asian was coincidentally Chinese, that they obviously must have LIFETIMES of talk in them. So we squeezed out, and surreptiously looked at them both, like we were setting them up for a date, and they caught on, instantly. As they would…but still, we persisted, and then were squeezed down the table towards one another, where they both played into our game and talked. And we sat there feeling mighty and wonderful, for having successfully hooked up our marvellously gorgeous Asian husbands.
Actually, they might have had more in common than their half Chineseness, but neither of us cared. We just wanted to look at them and go “aren’t they ADORABLE?! Look at them bonding!” Did they bond? Well, they gave it a very good go I think, and probably only so that we would leave them alone and stop trying to force instant attractions between them. It also meant that I got at least another half hour of being out with adult people, in an adult setting, which I was extremely pleased about. But what I think I really wanted to mention was that we decided – that’s right darling, you’re not getting out of it now, because I REMEMBER EVERYTHING! Even when I’m drunk…to do NaNoWriMo together, this year. Right? Masters Degree aside, we’re going to do it! Yes we are! I’m excited. Course, I should be writing now. I really should be. I will. I’m going to do it it, very soon. And then, that means, by November, I’ll have a good chunk done and can be mad and unseemly and rush through the entire month of November, by the skin of my teeth successfully writing 50,000 words in 12 days again! That’s just how I roll, internet. You’ll get used to it.
You know, it’s been so very long since I’ve been out, not just in this city, but anywhere at night, that I was utterly struck dumb by – yes obviously the price of drinks – but also, the amount of people who go out and just co-exist outside, in the cold, wearing barely anything! We followed out a girl who was so tall her ass was eye level with me, and I’m not sure if she was wearing a skirt, or if it was a belt and she forgot her skirt, but I was transfixed to her derriere right up until she finally lead us out of the huge mingling of people and onto the street. You know, young people wear the most amazing..and..okay I admit, sometimes downright frightening ensembles. I wonder if old people used to look at me and think the same thing. I expect they did, considering the lack of clothing I used to wear.
Also, I’m a little disturbed that I’m thinking this way. Oh dear lord, I’m going to wake up deaf and geriatric. Wait…I think I already have.